I like to hike. Cody on the other hand... Lets just say he is going to be getting very used to it by the time next winter rolls around. We've decided we want to be more adventurous and outdoorsy people. The fact that we live in the country and next to mountains should help us in this new endevour of ours. 

We've been talking about getting hiking packs for the girls to be carried in for a while and decided to finally get some. We were a little nervous because the last time (and first time) Ellie was ever in one was over Labor Day and she screamed in Cody's ear for a good 20 minutes straight.

We must have been a funny sight to see at sportsmans when we went to go look at them. At one point we had both girls in different packs on the floor and on our backs with the packs all across the walk way. Ellie kept screaming that she didnt want to be on moms back, she wanted dad to carry her. And then she would change her mind again. We love the two year old indecisive stage. Or not.

We got the packs, ate a quick dinner, picked up my mother in law and headed up to the bottom of the mountain. We didn't exactly factor in the wind as an issue because it wasn't blowing at our house but it definitely was when we got u there. We took a short four wheeler ride through the farm land to get to the base of the trail. 

The trail was surrounded on both sides by sage brush and the most beautiful yellow ad purple wild flowers. The girls loved it, so did tony. Kate had her eyes on him the entire time and would wave whenever he turned in her direction. She sang while Ellie kept telling puppy to keep up. 

We got to a meadow where we decided would be our turning around point. Ellie loved running free and sitting in the tall grass. There was hardly any wind and it was the perfect temperature. Next time we go we will plan for more time to explore and enjoy the stream next to the meadow. We didn't want to cut it too close to sun down. 

I'm so excited for this summer. In this area of farmers it seems rare that men have a day off. I love that Cody is able to spend Saturdays with us and have time to do fun things, like hiking, as a family! 

We started off our Easter weekend on Saturday with a ward Easter breakfast and egg hunt. Each child was able to collect 6 eggs but when all the eggs were found Ellie was disappointed with the color of eggs she had. She threw a fit until I showed her that there was chocolate inside and then we didn't hear another complaint! 

Saturday afternoon was supposed to be Cody's grandmother's 90th birthday party. She took a fall a few days before and wasn't able to attend because she was in the hospital being monitored. So instead of a birthday party we still had a party with Cody's extended family on his mother's side, lunch and an egg hunt included.

After the extended family all left, it was just Cody's siblings and their kids. We love Cody's family, especially Ellie, she loves having so many cousins to play with!  My father in law recently built a shop/garage and the kids loved it. It echoed and there was a lot of screaming involved. I think from now on the bikes will be taken outside and the door locked though. Ellie didn't know what to do with herself when we got home that night, our house was too quiet.

Easter was great this year. We had a quiet morning and it was perfect. Ellie was so excited to have a new flower skirt to wear and we waited until after church to do the Easter baskets and hidden eggs. At church I teach the 12-13 year old girls but not on that Sunday, it was a special Sunday. We had another lady come and teach all the young women and we had a condensed traditional passover. Cody and I got to read the scripts and explain what everything was and what it represented. It was a perfect beginning to the holiday because we were reminded of what we were truelove celebrating. 

We waited until after church to give the girls their baskets and hide the eggs. I'm so glad we kept things simple and didn't go over board because the girls really only cared about the actual baskets. Ellie liked her pony so much that she took Kate's pony as well. Kate sat and shook her basket for a good fifteen minutes while Ellie found all the eggs. 

The best part of the entire day had to be when Ellie discovered that there was chocolate in some of the eggs! Her face lit up and she ripped that first wrapper off faster than I've ever seen her move. We finished the day with a ham dinner with Cody's parents and ate a lot more chocolate and sugar than we will ever need in a lifetime.

I love that Kate looks a lot like Cody, especially that she has his eyes. These girls have such a special bond with Cody. They get so excited when he comes home and cries whenever he leaves. He takes time to let them each know individually that their father loves them and shows them constantly that he will always be there for them. A mother couldn't ask for any better for her girls.

For about two and a half weeks straight one or both girls were sick. We were going a little stir crazy and may have seemed a little crazy with cabin fever. That just meant we had to get creative. There were a lot of baths to make miss Kate happy and when Ellie was sick we watched every single episode of Jake and the Never land Pirates at least twice.

I'm so glad that they are both feeling better now so that we can go outside and go do things again! We hadn't been to story time in a few weeks and we were excited to go this past week. After story time we headed to the park with some friends. It was needed by all parties involved. 

A funny story about Ellie... I had given both girls their own bowl of cheerios to eat as a snack in the living room. Ellie, being ingenious, decided that eating with her feet would be a good idea. She would stick a piece between her big toe, bring her foot up to her mouth, and eat if from right in between her toes. So gross but so funny at the same time.

Yesterday we stripped the cushions off the couch to vacuum unterneath them. Ellie somehow fell off head first and started laughing, saying that she did a big flip. She did it a few more times, but quickly learned to put her hands down first and then roll off. When Cody got home from work last night I asked her to show him how she did a big flip. Somehow she forgot. She put a pillow on the floor and pretty much face planted/belly flopped right onto it. We couldn't help but laugh while she looked confused and then finally started laughing along with us.  

I know most people are so sick and tired of hearing about the song "Let it go" from Disney's movie frozen. I hate all the speculations about there being subliminal messages about the sexuality of Elsa. I think the reason I hate it so much is because for me the song has an entirely different meaning. 

I wont lie, its a song I get pumped up to when I run and I love it. To me its about literally letting go and taking a breath. Its about getting rid of things and stop holding onto things that are negatively affecting you in your life. In my life its about letting go of all the things I can't do or accomplish. Its about learning to let go when I feel like I am barely keeping my head above water to all the things that aren't important so I am able to refocus on what is. 

When I listen to this song I am reminded that I am not going to be perfect, ever. And that's perfectly alright. But what I can do is change my attitude to one that is more positive. In the song she talks about not letting her fears control her anymore and testing the limits. Its about letting go of the fear of trying that is holding me back from trying new things, from being a better friend, or wife or mother because they are unfamiliar. Let go of that fear and just do it. Try it, why not?!

Let go of the fear of not being good enough. Or just enough in general. I wont lie, sometimes I doubt my role as a mother and a wife and wonder how different things would be if I was a completely different person. I look at others and think that they are so much better than me, more spiritual, more in tune with their children's needs, their relationship with their husbands looks so much different than mine. But I am learning to let them go. Let go of the comparing and just try to do better today to be better than I was yesterday, not someone else. 

So here I am, and here I will stay. Because I am learning to let go to be a better me. The best me I can be.

And because I'm a sucker for all things piano... and this is probably the best cover I've heard.

Two of the hardest things as a parent is watching a sick kid be miserable and the other is having to clean up throw up. Just our luck we had both happen today. Now that I am in bed with everyone else asleep I can laugh about it, just don't ask what I was doing earlier. 

We headed to Twin this afternoon to make a "quick" Costco run. We should have known that those are impossible. Cody's quick stop at the store (the main store he works for in twin) ended up being me and the girls playing in the pick up for over an hour while I patiently waited for Cody to return so I could use the restroom (that place is a maze).

I usually make up some excuse to swing by target but decided this would be a purely Costco trip and I was very proud of myself. As we were headed that way Ellie kept complaining about her stomach hurting. I should have caught on to the hints of refusing any and all food and only requesting milk as meaning this was a day she was going to throw up. So she's complaining about her stomach hurting and blah blah blah. I turn to ask Cody is he has cash for us to grab a slice of pizza for her to eat while we shop and that's when I heard it. It was bad. All over her and her beloved blanket and puddle beneath her. We made a stop at target to grab new clothes and get her cleaned up. Ellie didn't mind because Cody picked up clothes off the clearance rack and the shirt happened to be hello kitty. 

I forgot to mention that she is going through a naked phase. Since we got home she has been taking off her pjs so she can wear the hello kitty shirt which was in the wash with her blanket. 

And miss Kate has had a fever today. Boo! But that hasn't stopped her too much, just and extra nap and snuggles. She is officially moble and nothing in the house is safe anymore. 

To add to the mess of the throw up all over the car seat, clothes, and blanket... Just as my luck would have it the washer decided to start leaking. But I'm pretty sure that was user error, it's not a good idea to walk around the house and find more things to shove in the washer. It's better to just make another pile for another load. 

Thank heavens today is over. And for an amazing husband who helps clean up throw up and doesn't complain when he returns home at 8:30 from a job and has to immediately fix a washer instead of eating his first meal of the day. 

Two weeks ago I ran my very first (of many I'm sure) half marathon! Now to some that may seem like no big feat, but to me it was. I had never thought of myself as a runner and never imagined running any more than a few miles. Right before I become pregnant with Ellie I started to run to lose weight. My goal at the time was just to be able to run for 30 minutes straight and a 5K (3.1 miles) seemed like so far!

Anyways... We started out the weekend by staying the night at my grandparents house. Of course it included Ellie playing the piano on grandpa's lap. Its so fun to watch her interact with some of my absolute favorite people. She would point to a note on the page and he would play it, occasionally she would correct him and tell him which key was really supposed to be played. My brother came over the next morning for breakfast and it was so great to just be able to catch up. 

Maybe I am creepy but I would not mind at all having family as my neighbors. I would totally buy a subdivision.

We grabbed my sister and her daughter and headed to Moab! We were all ready to get out of the car by the time we got there. We headed to the expo to pick up our bib numbers and started the search for dinner. There were quite a few people on the same page as us. We decided ordering food and taking it back to the hotel was the best option. We checked out a few stores and of course flattened a penny while we were waiting. I don't know if I had ever had any better chicken parmigiano as I did that night. Maybe it was good because of nerves, I don't know.

The hotel situation was kind of a joke. Everything was ridiculously expensive for the weekend and we were a little late in trying to find a place to stay. The hotel we found was the first building as you came into town but it had a pool and a pretty neat playground. My pirate obsessed daughter loved it and kept saying that she was Jake!

The morning of the race we grabbed breakfast at the hotel and headed to the park to wait for the bus to shuttle us up the canyon. Here was my first mistake. I am used to eating within an hour before I run. We loaded the bus at 8am and the race didn't start until 10am.

They had quite a few restrooms at the top, thank heavens. We had a little over an hour to wait after we got to the starting line and it was COLD! It was in the 30's but we knew as soon as the sun came out and we started running that we would be warm.

As soon as the gun went off people started cheering and the atmosphere was so much fun! It took a few minutes to get past the starting line but as soon as we were over we were flying. Partly because the first little bit was all downhill but also because we were on a running high... before we even started...

The first few miles were great. We held a good pace and it seemed like we were passing a lot of people. After a few miles there started to be quite a few hills that I hadn't trained for or anticipated. I should have assumed because we were in the canyon! 

We ran most of the hills and were feeling great. I was starting to get a little tired but still feeling strong when the winds started to blow. This is where things got real for me. Idaho has a lot of wind. While I was training for this half marathon I ran in a lot of wind, not by choice. I felt as if the wind was challenging me, encouraging me, letting me know that I was strong enough to over come this obstacle in my race. At one point we hit a hill during this crazy intense wind. I was tired and wanting to walk or at least slow down. There were others around me doing it so why not?! I looked at my sister and she gave me a thumbs up and we pushed through to the top of the hill. As we came over the top the wind seemed to change directions. Instead of it being a head wind, it was now coming from behind pushing us forward. The wind was helping me move forward. I had done the work and put in the time, it wasn't time to quit just yet. I wasn't finished and my friend, the wind, was letting me know that all was well. 

Cheesy. I know! But that was exactly my thoughts and what helped me get through that part.

A few miles after that we came across a lady that was laying on the side of the trail. She was surrounded by other runners. We knew there was nothing that we could do and that she had the help that she needed. Almost as soon as we passed her a song came on in my play list that I had heard a hundred times before but this time I heard lyrics that I hadn't before. 

"When you fall get up, oh oh
If you fall get up, eh eh"
In that moment I was running for all the times I thought I couldn't. I was running because it was something I could control and that I knew I could do. It didn't matter what struggles I faced to get there emotionally, physically... I could do it. I have always gotten back up no matter what may have  caused my fall. And yes its a shakira song so of course I was dancing along to the beat.

It wasn't all easy sailing and peachy perfect. It was tough. My sister started to have an upset stomach around mile 9, so four miles or so to go. We walked at a few points to help ease the pain and after a minute she would be just fine to keep going. This is where I started to have a hard time as well. You are supposed to fuel along your runs if they are longer than an hour. In training I had run 10 miles as my longest run in under two hours and didn't consume anything besides water. I figured it was only three more miles and that I would be ok. I don't know how I finished. I was so exhausted by the time we came out of the canyon and had two miles left. 

We saw Cody and the girls parked on the side of the road waving us on with less than a half mile left. That was the boost I needed to finish strong even though I wanted to hop in the pick up and die. Or just sleep for the rest of the day. When we finished my legs were stiff and I felt like I was going to either faint or throw up, or both. The feeling went away after I got real food and a nap, thank goodness.

Running is such an emotional and spiritual journey. And of course physical. I run for clarity and for sanity. I run to feel freedom and empowered by what my body can do. I am slow but thats ok because I don't run for the time. I get to be able to push myself further than what I feel comfortable with and do things I never thought were possible. Some days I have terrible runs and think that I never want to do it again. But I have to redeem myself and the next day will have a great run. We put up with the hard things in order to enjoy the good, or even the mediocre. 

I run because it allows me to feel like I have complete control in my destiny. If I am lazy and don't push myself then I wont get any better. I know if I push myself and try harder to become better that I can accomplish goals and see not only physical but mental improvements.

So basically I like to run. I run for fun in the hot hot sun. I run for me. I run to better myself and to push myself out of a comfort zone. And because I like to see things improve I just signed up for my second half marathon in June! Yes, I am very excited. I know what I need to do to take care of my body to allow it to perform at its best. And yes, I am also nervous because I know I have to work hard to become better.

Ellie does some pretty entertaining things. I thought I'd better keep track of a few before she stops and I forget. 

If she hears the word awesome she says " Ellie's awesome." 

Sneaks books into bed at nap time to read out loud to herself and Kate. 

She whispers come here when she wants to show you something and gets a grin on her face as if she's showing you a lost treasure. 

She has learned to shake her little hips and thinks its the funniest thing ever. Her dancing now includes hip shaking, running around in circles occasionally with her eyes closed and doing a downward facing dog and flopping onto her side calling it a flip. 

Ellie can be very polite at times. Today we were holding wipes and karate chopping them out of each others hands. Every time I would hit hers she would laugh but every time she would hit mine she would grab it off the floor while saying here you go mom. 

If I ask her to do something lately the response is "sure mom" or a no with a bobble head yes.

When there is good music on in the car she closes her eyes and sways her head from side to side excitedly saying "I dancing! I like sumic."

She calls music su mic. It's hilarious. 

Ellie was falling asleep on the swings today at the park. I told her it was time to go home so she could take a nap. She gave me this wide mouth grin and repeated "no nap! I happy!"

Cheetos. Every meal she requests Cheetos. 

When she is supposed to be in bed for the night she will come out of her room, climb up on my lap on the couch, put her hands on both my cheeks and kiss my forehead and then go play. Hopefully this will not be happening tonight because Cody is finally home but it did happen a couple times this week and it was just too sweet to forcefully tell her to go back to bed. 

Talking. So much talking! I told her Cody was in Colorado this week and she calls it colo wa wo. It's hilarious. 

Lotion. Lo-Shawn at least twice a day. And flowers. Everything she wears has to have a flower on it. 

If I run on the treadmill while she's awake she sits and yells faster mommy! Same with the car. "Faster mommy! Bad guys and monsters coming! Faster!"

I'll have to add to the list later but that's all I can think of off the top of my head. And because I'm also a little distracted because we are watching frozen for the umpteenth time.