We are always going to have days that aren't as successful and days that just are off. But I have found my attitude is a huge determining factor in how the day goes and how I parent. Ever since I have been a mom I have felt like I have to justify being a stay at home mom. That I have to let people know that I am also taking classes because being a mom isn't good enough for everyone else, it wasn't good enough for me. Plenty of women are busy with other things and raising kids while I'm only taking care of one small child. For a long time I felt like I NEEDED to do something outside of the home because a lot of other people were. I wasn't comfortable with people thinking less of me and my talents because I stayed at home. I have nothing against working moms and I grew up in a household where my mom did work, we all turned out fine and have a great relationship with our parents (just throwing that out there, I'm not writing this to offend anyone).
I was afraid to admit that I liked being a stay at home mom. I like wearing comfy clothes and staying at home. I was embarrassed to admit I hate being busy all the time and I love having a lot of down time. I do like to get out of the house but I'm content if the furthest we get is the mailbox. I feel like there is so much pressure to do so much and have so many talents and hobbies. I was embarrassed to admit that I like reading kids books and singing silly songs rather worrying about a stressful job and all that they can entail.
I am no longer embarrassed to say I am a mom and that is all. I am so excited for this semester to end so I can focus more of my attention to what I love most, being a mom (and taking as many naps as possible before this baby comes). For a long time I felt like when I had two kids that I would have a reason to justify staying at home but there is no reason to justify doing what I love.
Yes somedays I wish I was more social and had something to do to get me out of the house. Somedays I even think having a job and stressing about meeting deadlines or helping customers would be less work than dealing with a cranky toddler throwing a fit. Being a mom isn't easy, it is the hardest and most trying thing I have ever done. But it is also the most rewarding. I get to be the one to teach our daughters how to say the alphabet and eat using a fork. I could work and allow us to have more monetary things like toys but to me those things aren't important. What is important is me being the best mom I can be and not being ashamed of staying home to raise my kids.
Ok rant over.
Jayme I know exactly what you mean. Some people look at you different when you stay home with just one kid. But from what I have noticed that one kid is harder then two. One kid wants/needs more attention, two they have a friend. Not saying transitioning to having two kids permanently is going to be easy. But certainly be proud of being a mom. :) You're doing a great job! I will make sure to tell you next time I am in town so we can let Kenneth and Ellie play.
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